Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Ahh, today...

Yesterday I had a Dr.s appointment. It went well. I gained another 4lbs. My blood pressure and glucose seem good. I have a Gestational Diabetes test in about a month. I also have a Chiropractor appointment next week. It's all zooming by. I'm having some trouble with my final decisions. I want to do things a certain way, but I may not have that option, financially. It's tough that my options aren't always mine. They are the wallet's. I want to make the best decisions for my child and for myself.

We're still not sure what will happen after the baby's born. We know he'll be out and ready for some TLC. And we'll be there to give it to him. At this point we're just trying to figure out who will be home with him and who will bring home the bacon. We're also trying to figure out how we'll pay for the birth. If only I could go into the woods somewhere, birth this child and then just jog on back to my house. At which point my family will gather, marvel and bask in the glow of my newborn and I will get to lay in bed recovering for a few weeks. If only that were how it worked.

I have to just pray that things will work out for the best. I am just short of giving up and just letting the system push me through, as it is prone to do. I'll be put on this conveyor belt: check in, lay and labor, be poked and prodded, lay and labor, push, push, no really...PUSH, and then at some point I'll have my child. I really just want it to be February so I can just look back at how I survived it all and how wonderful it was.

Where is Marty McFly when you need him?

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